Part 2 (kinda)

Sorry I'm not very regular with this blog. Life is just super busy as always. I'll try to pick up our little story.....

I served in the Oklahoma National Guard for 6 years as an Infantryman. Nothing very exciting really, humped a ruck sack and carried a M60 machine gun thru the woods of SE Oklahoma was about it. I did one 3 week rotation thru NTC as OPFOR my last year in but that was it. I ETS'd in March, 2000 and in April was a proud member of the US Navy Reserves......yup, the Navy in Oklahoma. Needless to say I was not on a ship. I served as an equipment operator for 3 years, then ETS'd from there as well. Again, not much to exciting......I was in when 9/11 happened but because I was still considered in training and had not been to my second 2 weeks of school yet I did not deploy with my unit....this decision was made by the unit just days before departing......AFTER the sad farewells from church....the family get togethers, and after quitting my job. Makes you look like a punk showing back up at church the following week only to say well, they changed their mind.....I'm not going. Stupid.....my unit deployed to GUAM to build roads......weren't even anywhere near any combat. Thanks....my one shot to serve active duty snuffed out because I haven't been to Gulfport, MS and drove a forklift for 2 weeks.

During this time I had several jobs, all of which were leading pretty much nowhere.

As soon as I got back home from Basic Training with the Guard I went to work for Wal-mart, first as a checker, then ended up after about 5-6 months as a department manager over pets, lawn and garden and seasonal.....i.e.; Christmas/Halloween/Easter/You Name it.......they were kind enough to pay me about $5.50 an hour to manage all three of these departments at the same time. Needless to say this didn't last long, although I truly loved the job. I think I just love people and helping others. During this time the kids started coming along......James Dean in November of 1993 and Paris in December of 1994.......for some reason I picked up the nickname of "fertile turtle" by the Wal-mart ladies.....;-).

I left this job and became an over-the-road truck driver for our great friends the Collards. I mostly hauled new horse trailers from the manufactures to the dealers. We ran basically the lower 48 states. Again, loved this job but missed the family. When I started out the kids would knock me down when I got home.....after a year and a half or so they didn't know who I was. I came off the road on a Thursday and told the boss I was hunting a local job, went to Ada Coca-cola on Friday and filled out an application and went to work on Monday.

Again, great job that I loved. Now I had the opportunity to combine 2 loves......people(sales) and driving. I had this job over 6 years and would still be there now had they not accused me of dishonesty. They had a history of accusing their highest paid drivers of theft.....in the 6 years I was there they had 5-6 guys that were in this category......I always had this suspicion in the back of my mind that they used this as a tool to fire people that they deemed to be making to much money but I never thought I'd be accused. I was a very effective salesman.....if the company goal was 6.5% growth I gave them 10%. Oh well, they will get what's coming to them.....I went directly to work for Pepsi with a single mission of spanking Coke.....glad to say I was pretty effective there as well.

I had applied for a government job while at Pepsi and was finally offered one. Pepsi was good to me and would have no issue working there again.I went to work for the McAlester Army Ammunition Plant as a forklift operator, then moved on into Transportation driving a semi truck hauling explosives on the installation. Loved this job as well but it was only a term job.

After about a year here I was offered an internship with the QASAS program (Quality Assurance Specialist, Ammunition Surveillance) which I'm working at today. After a year of school at McAlester we were sent to Fort Riley, Kansas.....what a great place and a tremendous blessing for me and my family. We found an incredible church home and we prospered while there. We also made some of our very best and closest friends while there. I pray that we will have the opportunity to return there some day.

Along the way we have had 5 great kids who continue to be an example to me. They make me want to be a better man, and better father. It is impossible to consider what I would be without them.

Well, I'm really not very proficient with my writing skills.......I have visions of me writing eloquent pieces, memorializing my family but end up with funny memories and sore wrists from chicken pecking on this thing!

Thru it all Tracy has been the one strong pillar in my life. She has never doubted me (well there was that one period when I was a meathead but we don't need to relive that), and has loved me when I surely did not deserve it. She has kept the church in front of me when I was making every effort to walk away, and for that I am truly grateful.

I'm glad I have eternity to try to thank her because I'll need it all.......after reading back thru this post is is obvious that it's all about me and that was not my plan......my work history is probably not the exciting blog reading you are hoping for but I think it is very telling for me......it shows me just how focused on making a living I was instead of focusing on making a life.

Thank God He forgives us and allows us these chances......

God Bless you all!

James

James and Tracy......the beginning of forever.

What a week this has been.

We are covered up at work. I just can't believe that we have so much work that needs to be done. It just seems unending. However, we are making progress so that is good I guess.

Today is Father's Day and it makes me miss Tracy and the kids that much more. I'll be glad when they come home.

This being "my" day I've spent a lot of time today thinking about them and considering just how blessed I am to have such great kids and such an incredible example in my wife. I cannot figure out why God has blessed me with them. He must have looked the other way or maybe on the 7th day while He rested I was able to sneak in and grab her up without Him noticing. I surely have not been worthy of the companion that He has given me.

I've spent a lot of time this last 2 weeks going through old photo albums and looking back on our life together. When someone says they started from humble beginnings, I can relate. Had I made some smarter decisions early on in my life this would not have been the case but I didn't and such is life. For a quick run down on our little history it looks a little something like this:

I met Tracy while she was in the 7th grade. I know it's hard to imagine but I wasn't exactly the "coolest" kid in school. I had been basically rejected by every girl in school, (whatever that means to an 8th grader). The next year I asked Tracy to "go" with me.....now I'm not sure where we were going to go but anyway.....actually I didn't have the guts to ask her, (you'll have that lack of guts after about 2 years worth of rejections) so I had a couple of her friends ask her for me. Her answer was priceless and one that I'll never forget: "NOT IN A MILLION YEARS!" Nice, huh? I'm really not sure what made her change her mind but maybe it was the relentless begging and stalking. Anyway, we were finally a steady couple and I was on cloud nine.....I was in the 10th grade and finally had a girlfriend. I still wasn't sure what I was supposed to do with her but I knew that the sun was shining brighter, the birds were singing louder and all was right in the world.

We have dated pretty much exclusively since then, although she did try to dump me after spending all of one summer in Colorado. You would have enjoyed this picture: She spent all of a summer with her brother in Colorado while I stayed back in Oklahoma and worked. ALL of the money I earned was exchanged for quarters so that I could stand at a pay phone in Calvin, Oklahoma in the blazing hot sun and talk to her......after a long summer it was time for her to come home. I lucked out and got to go out with her Mom and Dad to pick her up.....I even got to drive my pickup out there! It was going to be a great trip......16 years old, road trip to Colorado, picking up my girlfriend, what could possibly go wrong? Well, for starters, expecting a glorious reunion was one......we showed up at her Grandma's house and WOW.......she had changed.....she was HOT, as in FINE. All tanned and looking good.....she went straight past me to her folks and siblings......I barely even got a little hug......then later that night, the dreaded words......"I don't think I love you anymore". Now, I cannot pretend to tell you I was not crushed......and mad.....after all, I had drove all the way to Colorado, and was now staying at her families place......just a tad awkward. I mean really.....I'm pretty sure she didn't just decide this when I pulled up in the driveway right? I'm thinking a phone call prior to me driving all the way to Colorado would have been acceptable.......anyway, after a few weeks of begging and bawling and just generally trying to make her feel guilty she finally relented and took me back. I really think I just wore her down to the point of submission. We have been together since. The road has not always been smooth but it has always been worth it.

We had a strange type of religious agreement between me and her folks.....kind of a dope deal so to speak. We would both go to our own church's on Sunday mornings, then she would go with me to church on Sunday nights. I would in turn go with her to church on Wednesday night.......really I was just going to be with her and to play basketball at the church house......because anybody who knows anything about Mormons knows that they love their church basketball.....which worked out good for me, (being the basketball stud that I was I got to improve my game and get brownie points for going to church with her). This deal worked pretty well over the years. I was active in my church, she was active in hers, and we got to be together everyday, so all was well. I was convinced that she would convert my direction in time......little did I know how my life would change. We talked about our beliefs often, her speaking doctrine of her faith and me trying to convince her that she was wrong. I never really had a problem with any doctrine it was just the title of Mormon that I couldn't get around. In my part of the world (the buckle of the Bible Belt) the title of Mormon is not held in high regards, although no one ever had a good reason why, other than the stacks of anti-Mormon pamphlets said they were bad people headed for Hell. It angered me that those that were speaking down about the church had never even set foot in an LDS church. This seemed very hypocritical to me, after all I wanted to convert her to my faith but it was evident to me that we were not acting very Christlike. I'm ashamed as I look back at the ridicule that she endured while attending church with me. What an incredible show of the strength of her testimony though. The seemingly bad opinion of Mormons was truly confusing to me since I was in their homes daily. It was a testimony to me and I found it intriguing that no matter how many times I went to church with her I NEVER heard anyone speak negatively towards another faith. After almost 16 years as a member of this church this holds true. They strive everyday to help their fellow man and try to be an example of Christ at all times, not just on Sunday's. They had the type of family life that I wanted......they loved each other and sought to make each other happy.

Anyway, after I graduated high school I took the missionary discussions from the missionaries in Ada, OK. I really only started taking the discussions because I told Tracy I would.....when I started I just wanted to show her I'd listen in the hopes that she would return the favor and listen to my faith's message as well. I couldn't believe it when I actually found myself wanting to learn more about the gospel. I was also surprised at how much I already knew, just from our mini discussions while out on dates and while sitting with Tracy during seminary on some Wednesday nights. Long story short (yeah right) I was baptised on November 22, 1992. I was so happy because I assumed that Tracy and I would go ahead and get married....now understand that she was still in high school but we had been dating 4 years by now.....it was time.....past time in my opinion. Tracy allowed that she would only be married in the Temple, which to us Mormons means we are sealed together for all time and eternity.....no "till death do you part" for us......that sounded great to me except for the little detail about me having to be a member for a year before getting married in the Temple. Great, another year. This was the first test of my new faith and I wasn't even dry from baptism yet!

So, one year and one day later we were married in the Dallas Temple, living in Calvin, OK in a trailer house that I'd bought for $3500.....now keep in mind that Tracy was still a senior in high school......she still had 6 months of school left. She was carrying James Dean at her graduation! Her graduation and prom I was unable to attend due to the fact that the job I had (A1 Feed Company, Holdenville, OK) that paid me $425 every 2 weeks wasn't paying the bills and we now had a baby on the way. So in April I headed off to boot camp in Ft. Benning, GA to become an infantryman in the Oklahoma National Guard......that was a long 3 months.

Looking back on our life together I can't help but get a little chocked up. We have been blessed with 5 great kids that honor their mother and father. We have had the opportunity to live in several different place and make some lifelong friends along the way. This little trip to Korea is just another example of that. God has blessed our lives and continues to do so everyday as we strive to live according to His will.

I'll pick up the story where I left off next time and provide more details as a way of documenting some of these events before I forget them.......

As always, God bless anyone that takes the time to read these words.

I hope that Tracy and the Kids know just how much they are loved.........

Just bored.....

Well, not much to report. Tracy and the kids are living the good life back in the states with the family. I'm just sitting around bored doing nothing.

Spent the last week at work getting the email inbox cleaned up after 3 weeks off. I can honestly say that I didn't miss work while I was gone.....it still pretty much sucks. I just miss working with the soldiers and going home at the end of the day feeling like I was value added. I work with good people I'm just not the desk riding type.

Spring is here with a vengeance. The country and even here in the city is all greened up. Korea is truly a beautiful country. Our apartment village is beautiful as well.....the Korean kids are out playing everywhere.

I enjoyed dinner with the missionaries on Friday night at a local Chinese restaurant.....Elder Stock, Elder Seal, Elder Rob and Elder Elder......yup Elder Elder, funny huh? It was good however I must admit I've been hesitant about eating at a place with only 1 table and that misspelled restaurant on their sign.

I went to the Camp Walker Armed Forces Day/Open House on Saturday afternoon......about 5000 Koreans from off-post came out to look at the military vehicles and helicopters that were on display.

I called up Mr. Kim my landlord on Saturday afternoon and got him to go to the ballgame with me. Daegu has a pro baseball team; the Samsung Lions. It was a great time and very family oriented. Cost me 6000 Won to get in which is less than $5.00, which then gets you general seating so you just go sit where you want. I'm glad to report that the home team won easily over the #2 ranked team in Korea. This will hopefully be a regular event for the family when they return.

Started the day off with church.....was a surprising number today with us starting summer we are usually low in numbers with families going back to the states for the summer and the English and DODs school teachers getting out for the summer but we ended up with 55 today. Lessons today were good.....can't get to much on the plan of salvation!

Just got back from Scouts....started out with the Wolf cubs even though Ryan is not here I want to stay involved so he can come straight back in once he returns. Then after Wolves I went over to the Camp Walker pool where the Boy Scouts met so that we could conduct swim tests in preparation for their summer camp.

Pretty busy week coming up. Cubscout Pack Planning meeting tomorrow night, BBQ with the Lambert's on Tuesday night, then headed up to Seoul on Friday after work to spend the night at the Temple......this Saturday will be my first day as a Temple worker! Should be good times!

I know one thing for sure. It has only been a week and I miss Tracy and the kids very much. You see I'm not really so much the loner type if you can believe it. I much prefer chaos as opposed to quiet. Quiet is good for a couple of days but 9 1/2 more weeks.....if you find that I've thrown myself off the 21st floor you will know it was because I was bored to death. You know, there is alot to do here but again.....not super cool doing them by yourself!

I truly do miss you kids.

And Tracy: In the words of the great poet Richard Marx.....I'm right here waiting for you.......

Love to all,

James

It just occurred to me that since I'm here all alone now my blog should be JAMES on a Mission instead of Tollett's.........or maybe Big Daddy on a mission......I'll have to ponder that a little more!

Just a note to anyone interested.

I know.....it's been a awhile.

I'm happy to say that we are back home in the states if only for a little while. I'm currently TDY at Ft. Leavenworth taking a 2 week leadership class. Tracy and crew are in Oklahoma with the fam having a good time I'm sure.

The reason for their visit is just plain sad. My cousin Liz who has been fighting cancer for several years lost her battle on May 2nd.....we knew that she didn't have long and Tracy and the kids as well as I were trying to make it in time to say goodbye and help out however we could. Unfortunately, we didn't make it in time. I don't really have adequate words to describe Liz other than if you knew her you loved her. She had an infectious sense of humor and a quick wit that I enjoyed sparring with. She will be missed tremendously by her Mom, husband and son and all of her family. Another noteworthy piece of info on Liz: She was the only member of my family that shared my faith and belief in the gospel of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I will miss her but through my faith in God and my understanding of what fate awaits us after death, I know that she is doing just fine.

I should take the opportunity now to share my testimony. First and foremost, I know that God lives. I have the utmost faith in the power of forgiveness that is offered thru the Savior. Jesus Christ suffered in the Garden of Gethsemane for me personally. He died on the cross and was resurrected on the third day so that we too may have eternal life.

I have a testimony of eternal families. I am grateful that I have been sealed for time and eternity to my incredible wife and children. They set the example of true Christ-like living everyday. I am constantly amazed at Tracy's boundless love for others. She is the most Christ-like person I know. I bear witness that she lives everyday of her life in this manner and sets the bar high for me to try to emulate her mark.

My kids have been an awesome blessing as well. I could not ask for better, more well behaved kids. I know that they love us as we love them. I'm amazed at their willingness to choose the right. Whether it be refusing to play ballgames or spend money on Sunday's in order to honor the Sabbath, or simply standing up to their friends when they cuss or make bad decisions, I know that they understand the sacrifices necessary to live their lives in a manner pleasing to God, as well as the blessing that come from making those hard choices.

I know that the Church is lead by a true and living prophet today in Thomas S. Monson. I know that the Book of Mormon is true. I testify that all men can know for themselves of this truthfulness if they will follow the council of the Apostle James in the Bible, James 1:5 which says: If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.

Don't let anyone fool you.......living the gospel and following the counsel of the church is hard. It may be easy for some, but not me. I'll admit it has gotten easier over time as I've tried to live and do what's right and have been blessed and had my testimony grow but it is still hard. I can understand why people are not interested in joining the church. This faith requires life altering changes. It requires you to focus on the Savior, and places enormous worth on service to others and love for your fellow man. There is no such thing as coming to church and dropping a dollar in the offering plate and going home to resume your normal life. We have no paid ministry.......so who do you think gets to do all this work? Hope you have gloves! This is why I love this church. While our people are not perfect the gospel of Jesus Christ is. His plan offers us the opportunity to be sealed together as families forever......there is no "until death do you part" in the Temple.

I doubt that anyone in my family and very few of our friends will ever read this but if so my prayer is simple: Please read the Book of Mormon. Pray in honest faith and ask God if it is true (see James 1:5). I promise you that the Holy Spirit will testify of the truthfulness of this gospel and your life and that of your families will be blessed for eternity. Please feel free to ask me any questions that you may have. I don't pretend to have all the answers but I'd be glad to try to share what I know to be true to anybody......even if it means just sending you a copy of the Book of Mormon.

Another tremendous blessing that we have enjoyed in our church is the gift of friends. I have met the greatest, lifelong friends inside the church. Friends that would be more willing to put their lives on hold to help us than any of my family. I know that my family loves us, don't get me wrong, but I also know who would WANT to drop everything to be with us. You all know who you are, so just know how much you mean to me and how much you have blessed my life, my families lives and strengthened my testimony. Your example and willingness to "keep the faith no matter what" has truly changed my life and saved it as well. The gift and blessing of you all cannot be overstated.

Also on this Mother's Day, I must tell Tracy just how much I love her. I can not even imagine where I would be or what I'd be doing if not for her. She truly makes me want to be a better man. I will never be worthy of her love but I'm thankful for it nonetheless. She is a perfect mother to our kids and I could not possibly ask for a better partner to walk thru this life with. Always know that I love you Tracy.

I pray that whoever reads this, that these words find you well.

God Bless & Love to all.

James

Church Video

Please watch this video: http://www.youtube.com/mormonmessages

Thanks, James

Marching on.....

Howdy all,

Just dropping another note to bring you up to speed a little with our busy existence......

We have all ventured out into the land of Korean food. Some of us more willingly than others. We had a great dinner out with the Branch President and his girls as well as the Missionaries. We ate a little bit of everything. I won't try to explain, I'll just let the pictures speak for themselves.

We had the opportunity to ride the bullet train up to Seoul last weekend as attend District Conference. We had a great time except that we didn't have time to get out and see anything. We stayed at the Dragon Hill Lodge at Yongsan garrison and had a great time. We also ran into one of Tracy's brother's wife best friends......Tracy met her at his wedding in Utah last August! Small world I guess. The talks at Conference were very good and even though we had some subway navigation challenges with 5 kids and the stroller we made it back to Seoul station for the return trip just in time.

I'm busy the next two weeks....suited up in uniform supporting the warfighter!

Pretty much all this week (or month) ;-).

Bye, James

Scouting

Well, I never promised I'd blog on a regular basis.....

I can't believe that February is almost gone. Seems like we just got here and it's been 3 months already. Time flies I guess. We are settling in better and have found a groove so I guess all is well. James Dean and I attended our first Boy Scout campout here in Korea this last weekend.....the infamous Klondike Derby. We didn't have any snow unfortunately but it was COLD. Highs around 25 degrees would be my guess. Anyway, we had a good time and we did have heated tents so we didn't freeze at night. I've been trying to post a bunch of pics to my Facebook but for some reason it is locking up on me. Ryan started Tiger Cubs this month so we now have 3 Scouts in the house. James Dean is now serving as the Librarian/Historian for the Order of the Arrow in our Troop. I am serving as an Assistant Scoutmaster in the Troop and also as the Cub Master for the Pack.....needless to say I'm busy.

On a sour note Tracy is fighting with the symptoms of Bells Palsy again. She is going in to see a doctor (Korean) this week. Please hold a good thought for her!

Jordan and Paris are both doing good in school and are making friends. Kylee is loving her Thursday story time's with Mom at the Library on post. We are missing you all and think of you often!

God Bless!